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Growing up LGBTQ+ in a Small Town

By : May 11, 2021 No Comment
When people think of small towns, I think a lot of the time they imagine some cute little place with a welcoming community where everyone gets along and loves each other. And while that’s not completely untrue it’s also not completely true either. As someone who has lived in a small town - that is technically labeled a village - for their whole eighteen years of living, I can say that small town aren’t always what they’re sometimes romanticized to be.  When I was growing up, I thought it was exciting to live in my small town. I was fooled by the rumors of small towns being cute and loving, but I soon realized that if you weren’t a certain way, you didn’t belong in this small town.  In my
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Outed

By : April 16, 2021 Comments Off
Most queer people have had strange and uncomfortable coming-out experiences. I know I have had plenty. Recently, I was accidentally outed to one of my grandparents. Having this conversation with grandparents is an awkward thing to do. However, being panromantic and asexual adds a strange set of complications to this process. Generally, people do not understand what asexuality is. Common responses are that it means that someone is scared of commitment, that they haven’t found the right person yet, or everyone’s favorite, that they are a plant. In order to avoid these discussions, asexual people often only come out as their romantic identity just to make things easier.  This is also something that people of other queer identities do. For example, pansexual people are often confused for being bisexual. While
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I Found My Home On Tumblr

By : February 7, 2021 Comments Off
Sixth grade. It was in sixth grade when I finally figured out why I felt different. As a kid, I was either labeled a tomboy or people blamed my behavior on the influence of my brother. I was just a kid, but I found myself considering self-harm to cope with this feeling of “not being like the other girls.'' Thinking about it now, I can’t see how my little sixth-grade brain thought that it didn't want to live another day feeling like this. I just wanted to feel normal, but couldn't for the life of me figure out how to do that. Finally, I came across this website called Tumblr. I know the younger me thought I was so edgy. While scrolling randomly for hours on end, distracting myself from
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Out of the Closet (and into the Fire)

By : February 7, 2021 Comments Off
I don’t think I ever considered being anything but proud. “Pride is one of the seven deadly sins, you know.” My utterly pure of heart, bible-thumping classmate once told me in our third-period history class. Unprompted. She looked so earnest when she held my gaze and told me, with such conviction, “It’s Adam and Eve, not Adam and Steve.” At the time, I wasn’t entirely aware of the closet. I hadn’t been raised by or around any out LGBT people. I was at a loss for terminology or any markers of identification, of any sort, that would allow me to feel the strength of the communities this peer of mine decided I was a member of, other than the slurs other classmates called me across the hallway and in the
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Validation

By : January 18, 2021 Comments Off
I feel like a common problem for our community is that many people invalidate our sexuality. When coming out to someone, it’s a natural response for them to ask me if I’ve ever dated a woman.  “Have you ever dated a girl?” is an annoying reaction when I tell someone I’m pansexual because that’s not what pansexuality is. Although I understand many people don’t understand what pansexuality is, I’m also confused as to why they don’t just ask, rather than jumping to the conclusion that I also date women aside from men.  After I have put some thought into this, it made me notice how many people want to hear someone’s dating history in order to validate that their sexuality. It’s completely unnecessary and invasive to be forced to tell
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Questioning Happiness

By : December 21, 2020 Comments Off
What does it mean to come out if you’re not sure who you are? I spent two years chasing after a boy who didn’t like me back when I was in middle school, all the way into my freshman year of high school. In my sophomore and junior year, I “fell in love” with another boy. During my senior year and in college, I experimented. In my head I kept thinking, I don’t like girls, I’m just a hormone-harboring teenager, what’s new?  I ended my freshman year of college with a girlfriend. A serious one, too. I mean, we fell in love, hard. Facetime calls never-ending, I was totally immersed in her. I thought she was immersed in me, but that’s a whole other story. Both of us were convinced
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