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How I Discovered What Being Gay Was

By : June 24, 2020 Comments Off
(Even If I Am Bi) I started questioning myself in fourth grade. We were lining up after recess and there was this incredibly cute girl I was friends with. I swear she was the cutest girl in the fourth grade. Anyways, our lines were close to each other and we were talking while the teacher was making sure no one had hidden in the bathroom. Once the teacher finished, our lines started moving and I am telling you, the sun hit her face so beautifully and everything started moving in slow motion. The rest of the world blurred and I heard nothing but my own heartbeat and breathing. Before I knew it, I was leaning in to kiss her on the cheek. Then my line moved. I caught myself and
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Passing with Pride

By : June 13, 2020 Comments Off
Pride as a concept has always been a little complicated for me. Growing up, I was super closeted - turns out getting consistently called “gay” as a pejorative for most of your childhood will do this to you! It wasn’t that I thought being gay was bad, it was just that the media I was consuming was Very Straight. When I was probably 14 or 15, I wanted to go to San Francisco on a weekend; I grew up in the suburbs, so it was only a 45-minute commute, but I still had to ask permission to go. I can’t remember if I began the conversation knowing that it was Pride weekend, but after I let it slip that it was happening, my dad told me I couldn’t go and
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The Moving Story of India’s First Gay Athlete

By : June 8, 2020 Comments Off
Dutee Chand – the name that defies all stereotypes. A trailblazer athlete, this ace Indian sprinter has been scripting history in the international sports scene since 2012. Known as the golden girl of India, her remarkable tale of triumph and glory inspires the new generation of sportspersons. Lauded for her professional achievements globally, her home truths have been the centre of undue attention. Humiliated and slammed for her personal “choices”, India’s first openly gay sportsperson, Chand’s life has always been under a microscope. This is her story of coming out in a rather conservative society where being gay is a subject of ridicule and mockery. Early on in her career, Chand fell victim to “Hyperandrogenism”, a clinical condition subjecting her to controversies and ostracization. Her body produced higher levels of
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Falling in Love with My Best Friend

By : June 1, 2020 Comments Off
I met my best friend in college during Bible Study at the Newman Center across the street from the University.  Weekly, we would attend Bible Study and Sunday night mass.  The more I got to know her the more I wanted to know.  She was funny, but also serious, and deep. She had beautiful eyes, and short brown curly hair, and her smile was Pretty soon we started to study together, eat meals together, hang out,talk all night long, and I felt like I have known her forever.  Both of us were raised Catholic, were first generation college students, and Therapeutic Recreation majors.  Looking back, I think it was obvious to most people that we were dating.  However, we were both oblivious to what was happening.  I walked a different
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Do You Like Girls?

By : May 19, 2020 Comments Off
She said it so flatly, as if it was another time and space completely, “Do you like girls?” I was sixteen, I think. Yea. Sixteen, and so far from my true self that at this present day I’d have to say that she was a ghost of some sort. A ghost of what’s left after adolescence, collecting any pieces of personality, however ill-fitting. How did the ghost respond? I think she said something like, ‘Sometimes.’ Which of course would be the most reasonable and literally factual response available to the ghost at the time. Which I suppose would have meant, “the best armored response that wasn’t aggressive or offensive.” Misleading? Maybe, but what could be expected? I mean this was probably the gayest human being I’d been within a few
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I didn’t come out. Gay just happened.

By : May 19, 2020 01 Comment
Why I never really came out in the traditional sense. Trigger warning: this article discusses substance abuse, mental health and suicidal ideation. If you asked me to describe my life from ages 15 to 23, I’d tell you that those were the worst eight years of my life that I wish I could forget. If you asked other people they’d say that I went to summer college at Syracuse University, damn near a full ride to college where I finished a five-year degree in four and a half and that I went to and completed graduate school at Columbia University.  Pretty big disconnect right? Hindsight is always 20/20 but at the time I couldn’t see that I was masking my pain with accomplishments so everyone around me would focus on
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