The Difficulties of Coming Out

I questioned if coming out was worth losing loved ones over. It was because I was standing up and presenting to the world my authentic self. That was ok. Everything was ok. God was still with me. He never left or wavered. The real truism is that those who left did so because of religious doctrine, yet God stayed.

In a perfect world, we can stand before our friends and loved ones, show them our authentic selves, and they will still love and depend on us. However, the real world is imperfect, so when I came out as bisexual to my loved ones a few years ago, some were accepting while others recoiled with disgust and turned away. For me, losing the people closest to me was undoubtedly the most difficult part about coming out because nothing could have prepared me for it.

My mother and best friend of ten years were both disgusted. My mother was angry with me and my best friend essentially told me that I was possessed by a demon. I was devastated and lost.

I questioned if coming out was worth losing loved ones over. It was because I was standing up and presenting to the world my authentic self. That was ok. Everything was ok. God was still with me. He never left or wavered. The real truism is that those who left did so because of religious doctrine, yet God stayed.

I liken coming out to a dust storm. During a dust storm, all is chaotic. But when the storm is over, the dust settles and all is calm. In the same way, time passed and although my friendship with my best friend ended completely, my relationship with my mother was restored.

I am now a very proud bisexual and spiritual woman. Coming out was not easy, as I lost people during the process, and that loss was difficult. But with time, it got easier, and the tremendous peace that comes from coming out was far greater than the loss.   

No matter who turned away from me, I always turned to God and he was always there, facing me, holding my hand, and guiding me through the storm.


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